In this episode, Alejandro relates his rather disturbing experience in one particular ceremony from his ayahuasca retreat in Iquitos, Peru in August 2024. Alejandro recounts his evening of existential dread—which he describes at one point as, "the worst feeling I’ve ever felt,” and Tobias offers insight and interpretation in response.

In the later stages of the episode, Tobias considers his intentions going into an upcoming ayahuasca ceremony.

Links

Altered Mates Website

Altered Mates Instagram

Music for the show by Si Mulumby

A Glimpse of Eternity by Alejandro Tuama

• Purchase the novel here (hard copy, ebook and audiobook).
• Listen to the free serialised audiobook here.

References

• The Temple of the Way of Light
• Tobias Penno — How Ayahuasca Offers Psychosocial Wellbeing
• Caffyn Jesse — Ecstatic Belonging: A Year on the Medicine Path

Altered Mates

• Episode 1 — Challenging Psychedelic Experiences
• Episode 6 — F-ing the Ineffable: William James, Mysticism, and the Psychedelic Experience
• Episode 18 — Coming out of the psychedelic closet
• Episode 19 — A Glimpse of Eternity
• Episode 20 — Surrender!

Links

Altered Mates Website

Altered Mates Instagram

Music for the show by Si Mulumby

A Glimpse of Eternity by Alejandro Tuama

• Purchase the novel here (hard copy, ebook and audiobook).
• Listen to the free serialised audiobook here.

Along the way we discuss the concept of “character loops” which Alejandro brings in from the HBO TV Series “Westworld”.

We reflect on how we can “de-armour” the ego and what it truly means to “surrender” to the medicine.

We find time to reflect on a recent mushroom ceremony, and in particular, the implications of this recent ceremony for Alejandro and his upcoming meeting with “the medicine” in the Peruvian Amazon.

And we toss around the concept of the “Daimon”, which Alejandro brings in from James Hillman’s book “The Soul’s Code”, and in particular consider the implications of what we call “daimonic derailment.”

As we mention in the episode, this will be the final episode for Season 1 of the Altered Mates Podcast. We are both keen as mustard to get cracking on Season 2, which will happen just as soon as I (Alejandro) return from South America.

Adios Amigos!

References

• Jonathan Nolan & Lisa Joy — Westworld (2016—2022)
• Hayao Miyazaki — Spirited Away (2001)
• The Daniels — Everything, Everywhere, All At Once (2022)
• The Wachowskis — The Matrix Franchise
• Chris Letheby — Philosophy of Psychedelics (2021)
• Game of Thrones — Dothraki
• James Hillman — The Soul’s Code (2017)

Links

Altered Mates Website

Altered Mates Instagram

Music for the show by Si Mulumby

A Glimpse of Eternity by Alejandro Tuama

• Purchase the novel here.
• Listen to the serialised audiobook here.

At this stage in the narrative, Alejandro’s alias, “Nick”, has made his way to Iquitos in the Peruvian Amazon. He is joined by his two mates, Stan & Billy, and they have just arrived at an Ayahuasca Healing Centre, named “Way of the Spirit”. Earlier in the novel, Nick undertook two very disappointing ayahuasca ceremonies in The Sacred Valley. He also fell into a downward spiral of anxiety, depression and self-loathing. Chapters 9 & 10 of A Glimpse of Eternity recount Nick’s first two ayahuasca ceremonies at Way of the Spirit and his first Tobacco Dieta.

From the blurb:

A Glimpse of Eternity is edgy, jungle-dank backpacker fiction infused with philosophy, ecstasy, and a dark sense of humour.

Nick is a twenty-seven-year-old high school teacher who has lost his way. Anxious, depressed, and frustrated, he travels to South America in search of his life’s purpose and hopefully, through the use of powerful psychedelic plants, a mystical experience.

At an ayahuasca centre deep in the Peruvian Amazon, confronted with the raw, overwhelming power of “the medicine”, Nick must learn to traverse the dangerous path on which he finds himself, or risk toppling over into insanity and despair.

This is a raw and unflinching novel about a young man’s search for a meaningful existence – a joyful, ecstatic journey of transcendence, tempered by the darkness and gut-wrenching horror of the path he must walk to get there.

The timing of this episode couldn't be better because the audiobook for A Glimpse of Eternity is now available for purchase, so if you enjoy listening to Alejandro reading the novel, then search for it wherever you get your audiobooks or check out the links below. (There's also a free version still available on the Altered Mates Patreon).

Links

Altered Mates Website

Altered Mates Instagram

Music for the show by Si Mulumby

A Glimpse of Eternity by Alejandro Tuama

• Purchase the novel here.
• Listen to the serialised audiobook for free here.

Hopefully, if enough of us find a way to share our stories, and if we can listen with open hearts and open minds, then maybe we can shift the mindset of the culture at large.

In this episode of the podcast, the Altered Mates each take a turn in reading a personal essay. Both essays amount to a “coming out” of the psychedelic closet, not just to our friends and families, but to the wider community. Tobias’ piece was written in 2020 for the Thank You Plant Medicine movement. Alejandro’s piece was published in 2021, in one of the last editions of the Psychedelic Press print journal.

Thank you for listening and we hope you enjoy this rather personal edition of the Altered Mates podcast.

References

• Thank You Plant Medicine

Links

Altered Mates Website

Altered Mates Instagram

Music for the show by Si Mulumby

A Glimpse of Eternity by Alejandro Tuama

• Purchase the novel here.
• Listen to the serialised audiobook here.

We venture into some controversial realms; for instance, thinking about whether we can legitimately call psychiatrists “glorified drug-dealers”, and whether prescribing anti-depressant medication might actually be taking autonomy away from people and preventing them from following through in a process that might lead to growth...

(As always, we remind listeners to take anything we say we a grain of salt— we are speculating here about the world around us, and we are open to be challenged and critiqued on anything we say).

Tobias reflects on the profound realisation that there might be something in the world smarter than him. And finally, after much probing and prodding, he elaborates upon what can be thought of as an “embodied” approach to plant medicines.

References

• Toko-pa Turner — Dream School
• Ava Irani — Functional Spirituality
• James Davies— Cracked
• Rage Against the Machine— Freedom
• Punk Therapy Podcast
• Dr. Sharon Stanley — Somatic Transformation
• Avatar: The Last Airbender

Links

Altered Mates Website

Altered Mates Instagram

Music for the show by Si Mulumby

A Glimpse of Eternity by Alejandro Tuama

• Purchase the novel here.
• Listen to the serialised audiobook here.

Our conversation centres around a classic work by pioneering American psychologist and philosopher William James (January 11, 1842–August 26, 1910), and specifically, the 1902 masterwork based on his Gifford Lectures: The Varieties of Religious Experience: A Study in Human Nature (public library | free ebook).

The discussion begins with Alejandro describing what he considers to be his first mystical experience at Machu Picchu in 2011, after a four day hike along the Inca Trail, and importantly, a few days after the first two ayahuasca ceremonies of his life.

The remainder of the episode is structured around William James’ four markers of mystical states:

1. Ineffability, 2. Noetic quality, 3. Transiency, 4. Passivity.

And while these so-called “mystical” experiences may be almost impossible to convey to one another, we disregard them at our peril... for, in the words of William James:

“Our normal waking consciousness… is but one special type of consciousness, whilst all about it, parted from it by the filmiest of screens, there lie potential forms of consciousness entirely different… No account of the universe in its totality can be final which leaves these other forms of consciousness quite disregarded.”

References:

William James — The Varieties of Religious Experience: A Study in Human Nature (1902) (public library | free ebook).

Quentin Tarantino — Pulp Fiction

• (The ‘Miracle’ scene)

The Wachowskis — The Matrix

• (The ‘Pill’ scene)

David Foster Wallace — This is Water.

Maya Newell — In My Blood It Runs

Robert Anton Wilson — Acceleration of Knowledge (Note: use chrome. The section around 38 mins is related to what we were talking about).

Albert Camus — The Myth of Sisyphus.

The Alex Grey Poster (Net of Being) featured in Alejandro’s house.

Tool — [Rosetta Stoned](https://open.spotify.com/track/0D8l86LXxKcgKAO17DfQsl?autoplay=true) — 10,000 Days

To find out more about the time Alejandro pissed himself during an ayahuasca ceremony, jump online and order a copy of his novel: A Glimpse of Eternity.

Links:

Altered Mates Website

Altered Mates Instagram

Music for the show by Si Mulumby.

In the conversation that follows the Altered Mates discuss three particularly challenging experiences from Alejandro’s psychonautical journey. The first with ayahuasca, the second with psilocybin mushrooms, and the third with DMT.

We use these three experiences as a launching point to consider what, as psychedelic practitioners, we can do with such experiences. How can we make sense of them? How do we reconcile them with our picture of the world? Because, if we are to take psychedelics seriously, and incorporate them into our lives responsibly, surely, we must consider their potential to present us with mystery, confusion and sometimes, complete and utter terror.

References

Graham Hancock on Ayahuasca, DMT and Entities.